Episode 29: How to Navigate Gender Bias And Lead Powerfully in Tech, with Angie Ruan

“You need to not assume that things will happen to you. You have to say, ‘I want it, I need it and I love it.’” – Angie Ruan

When you think of certain occupations such as engineer, is there an image of what you think that person should look like? Today’s inspiring  and deeply talented female tech leader recognized her own immense gifts and had the confidence and belief in herself to identify supportive environments that would allow her to pursue her ultimate dreams in the male-dominated field of technology.

Angie Ruan is a SVP of Technology at NASDAQ. Previously, she held various key executive positions at American Express, PayPal and eBay. She has successfully helped American Express, PayPal and eBay transform technology offerings and deliver incredible business results.

One of Angie’s passions is to contagiously inspire others to make a difference, especially in the community of women. She served as the President of eWIT (2012~2014), eBay-Women-in-Technology, a grassroots organization that promotes the interest of women in technology with 2000 members globally. She was recognized as a Woman of Influence in 2014 by Silicon Valley Business Journal.

After living in California for over 20 years, she relocated with her family to New York in 2015. She is a mother of two, an engineer by heart, a leader by training, a podcast fanatic, and a lifetime learner.

Angie’s story is an inspiring one for the next generation of women leadership and shows the importance of finding a culture that naturally supports women, and then having the confidence to pursue the available opportunities and speak up and rise up powerfully to do your best, most inspired work.

Highlights from this Episode:

  • Today’s Finding Brave Tip on what having greater awareness will do for you [1:19]
  • How the experience of growing up in China, and loving math, shaped who Angie is today [4:30]
  • What the United States can learn from China when it comes to women in the technology field [7:07]
  • Why having humility as a woman today is not always a good thing [10:01]
  • How Angie has chosen the amazing positions she’s held in technology during her career [10:44]
  • What she means when she says that you need to be the “purple cow”, and how to do it the right way [12:16]
  • Angie’s thoughts on unconscious bias in the workplace and how she’s handled it [16:46]
  • A memorable “failure” she’s had and the lessons learned from it [19:25]
  • The reasons that Angie joined NASDAQ and the new perspectives she’s gained by being there [23:00]
  • Her advice for teenage girls and why she feels that it isn’t just a glass ceiling but a sticky floor that’s holding back women [30:07]

For more information:



Resources Mentioned:

Kathy’s Forbes Interview with Angie, Supporting The Growth Of Women In Tech


“I think being aware is probably a number of things. I have been aware of myself, and I have been aware of my surroundings.” [11:44]

“The technique of how to raise your voice and how to describe what you want is also very important.” [15:58]

“Something that I’ve learned throughout the years is knowing I need to tell people what I want, but at the same time, being tactical about how to say it.” [17:01]

“I’m hoping that I can be the role model for anybody else, being a woman leader in technology.” [26:22]

I had grown up in China, I’m a woman and I’m a leader. So with all of them, it’s really against the odds of who in the corporate world becomes a leader. I am here, and the reason I am here is because so many people helped me to be here. So I was really, really blessed.” [26:30]


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Episode 28: The Epidemic of Loneliness In the Workplace and How To Cure It, with Mike Stallard

“It was really a life-changing experience, but it made me realize I’m hard wired to connect, as we all are. When we don’t have that connection in our lives we dysfunction,and that’s what’s happening today.” – Mike Stallard

In this episode of Finding Brave, you’ll be hearing how there’s an epidemic of loneliness today in America and other democracies around the world that makes people less resilient in coping with stress. Why is this something we need to pay attention to? Our expert guest today shares the serious outcomes of low connection coupled with a high level of stress, and how human connection is a superpower that makes you healthier, happier and more productive.

Michael Stallard is a keynote speaker and expert on how effective leaders boost human connection in workplace cultures to improve the health and performance of individuals and organizations. He is president of the Connection Culture Group, a leadership training firm, and the author of two books, Connection Culture and Fired Up or Burned Out.  His clients have included Costco, Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center, NASA, and Turner Construction Company. Texas Christian University founded the TCU Center for Connection Culture based on Michael’s work.

Not only does Mike share how strengthening our connections will benefit our overall well-being, but he backs it up with fascinating studies and data, as well as his own personal experiences. Reaching out and connecting with others may not be easiest thing to do for some of us, but it truly is time to “find brave” and connect with the people around us in a much deeper way, to enhance our life experience and strengthen our ability to live well and healthfully.

Highlights from this Episode:

  • Today’s Finding Brave Tip – what is the nature of your connections? [1:35]
  • A powerful example of true connection from Mike’s personal life [4:18]
  • The best example of a strong corporate culture that he has seen and why it was such a surprise to him [6:50]
  • What two qualities Mike’s clients possess and how he’s helping them build a culture of connection [10:42]
  • The loneliness research Mike has conducted and the shocking results he discovered around the issue [12:31]
  • How trauma and stress affects the brain, and the way connection heals this [16:45]
  • What we should be looking for in the people we’re connecting with [20:10]
  • The ways in which the stress-connection gap varies between different groups of people [24:21]
  • 5 ways we can boost connection in order to make a difference [25:50]
  • What future leaders need to consider in order to build a culture of connection [32:31]

For more information:



Connect with Mike:




Resources Mentioned:

Mike’s Books, Connection Culture: The Competitive Advantage of Shared Identity, Empathy and Understanding at Work & Fired Up or Burned Out: How to Reignite Your Team’s Passion, Creativity, and Productivity

Get sample chapters of Connection Culture plus a 28-page free ebook, 100 Ways to Connect by signing up for Mike’s newsletter (click here

Kathy’s Forbes interview with Mike:
What You Don’t Know About Building a Connection Culture Is Hurting Your Business

Mike’s LinkedIn Article, Seven Practices That Protect Your Organization From The Lethality Of Loneliness

UCLA Loneliness Scale (Version 3)

Episode 27: Leading With Emotional Courage, with Peter Bregman

Connect: 12 Vital Ties that Open your Heart, Lengthen your Life, and Deepen your Soul by Edward M. Hallowell, M.D.


“We look for leaders who share two qualities: they care about people and they care about results, because their work is serving people in some way.” [12:10]

“We have a public health crisis, because loneliness is killing us. We have high stress and low connection, and that combination is lethal.” [14:45]

“If we build our lives strictly around chasing money, power and status, it’s a shaky foundation.” [16:27]

“Being intentional about getting connection into our lives really is not just a want, it’s a need.” [19:22]

“There are deeper connections and more casual ones, but they all have a positive effect on us.” [21:21]

“When we do serve other people, it connects us.” [30:54]


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Episode 27: Leading With Emotional Courage, with Peter Bregman

“What I’m going to encourage listeners to do, and what I talk about in Leading with Emotional Courage, is to trust the emotions in a certain way and in a way that you don’t have to figure everything out with your head. Figuring it out with your head keeps the ego in control, and actually stops the emotion from moving on.” – Peter Bregman

Being brave is about acting powerfully in the world, and emotional courage, or being brave on the inside, is what we’re talking about today. Our guest today shows us that if you are brave with what you are willing to feel, then you can be brave in what you are able to do.

Peter Bregman is the CEO of Bregman Partners, a company that helps senior leaders create accountability and inspire collective action on their organization’s most important work. He is the bestselling author of 18 Minutes, and his forthcoming book, Leading with Emotional Courage, is being released this month.

You’ll hear stories from Peter’s own personal journey about what emotional courage looks and feels like, and learn the value of being able to feel our feelings without fully understanding, analyzing or criticizing them. This is key because, as you’ll hear, if you’re willing to feel everything, you can do anything.

Highlights from this Episode:

  • This week’s Finding Brave Tip on what you can learn from your experiences [1:58]
  • What emotional courage is and what leading with it looks like [3:53]
  • How we’re being held back from having the difficult, but necessary, conversations with ourselves and others [4:58]
  • The distinction between emotional intelligence and emotional courage [6:40]
  • How women and men navigate their feelings much differently [9:02]
  • What happens when we repress our feelings and Peter’s real life example of what to do instead [9:58]
  • His best practices for expressing our feelings [13:49]
  • What’s missing in leadership today, and the 4 things that every successful leader must possess [22:58]
  • How exposing and expressing vulnerability is looked at for both women and men [28:28]
  • One of the most important takeaways Peter wants people to gain from his latest book [34:28]

For more information:


Connect with Peter:




Resources Mentioned:

Peter’s Latest Book, Leading with Emotional Courage:
How to Have Hard Conversations, Create Accountability, and Inspire Action on Your Most Important Work

For pre-order incentives,  click here

His Previous Works, 18 Minutes: Find Your Focus, Master Distraction, and Get the Right Things Done, Four Seconds: All the Time You Need to Stop Counter-Productive Habits and Get the Results You Want & Point B: A Short Guide to Leading a Big Change

Radical Aliveness Institute


26: How To Build a Better World Through Better Work, with Kristen Aldridge and Seth Mattison


“Emotional courage is the willingness to feel everything.” [4:12]

“Failure feels bad and we don’t want to feel that, so we avoid taking a risk. If you’re willing to feel everything, then you can do anything.” [5:38]

“If we’re willing to feel, that’s a whole different degree of emotional intelligence.” [6:58]

“If you can trust a process, you don’t need to figure it all out in your head.” [16:09]

“If we seek to change, then we’re going to seek to feel authentic for some period of time, until the clothes fit.” [20:30]

“You need emotional courage in order to be confident, connected and committed.” [26:00]


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Episode 26: How To Build a Better World Through Better Work, with Kristen Aldridge and Seth Mattison

“It’s all testing and all fighting through the limiting beliefs and the thought that your ideas aren’t good enough, and then realizing you can create anything that you want.” – Kristen Aldridge

“If you want to be a leader today, it’s not about whether or not you like people. If you want to be a leader today, you have to LOVE people, period.” – Seth Mattison

This episode of Finding Brave will undoubtedly inspire you to go out and find brave to do the amazing things you dream to do and be in the world, much like guests you’ll meet today.

Kristen Aldridge and Seth Mattison are the co-founders of Luminate, whose mission is to connect, support, empower and inspire leaders and entrepreneurs to create work experiences that fill people up, rather than run them dry. In addition to founding Luminate, Kristen is an Emmy-winning journalist who has created content for hugely recognizable brands like Entrepreneur, ABC, CBS, Yahoo! and ESPN, and Seth is an internationally renowned author and expert on the future of work and leadership.

Seth and Kristen share their real-life stories and experiences of the good, the bad and the sometimes ugly of what it is to refocus and combine their respective talents as a husband-and-wife team to launch a huge passion project that they’ve dreamed and designed to positively impact the world.

In the show, Kristen shares openly about the unexpected and sometimes raw and vulnerable aspects of the entrepreneurship journey, and Seth describes all that he’s learning about how leaders can (and must) illuminate their work and their organizations through the power of love.

Highlights from this Episode:

  • Kathy’s Finding Brave Tip for living your best life possible [1:44]
  • The mission and motivation behind Luminate [4:29]
  • Why launching before ready is often a necessary (but painful) strategy [8:04]
  • Seth’s background and how he’s now transitioning his experience to the digital world [10:00]
  • Kristen and Seth’s mission statement and who they look to attract and support now [15:54]
  • What Kristen’s Project Luminary is all about and how she decides who to spotlight [21:59]
  • How to be a true leader today and the role that love plays in that journey [25:12]
  • An example of how powerful kindness and empathy can be [28:19]
  • The biggest challenges in entrepreneurship each of them faced and what they did to overcome them [31:34]

For more information:





Connect with Kristen and Seth:













Resources Mentioned:

Kristen’s Project Luminary

Seth’s Book, The War At Work: A Tale of Navigating the Unwritten Rules of the Hierarchy in a Half Changed World

Kathy’s Amazing Career Project 16-week online course & 6 Dominant Action Styles Quiz

When Generations Collide: Who They Are. Why They Clash. How to Solve the Generational Puzzle at Work by Lynn C. Lancaster and David Stillman


“There’s a vision of what we think and want Luminate to be about, but we are continuing to refine that message and what that purpose is, every single day.” [Seth, 5:13]

“Here we are putting out inspirational articles about how to live your best life, and your best career, and be empowered, and I’m going through the very same thing.” [Kristen, 7:25]

“We can support leaders inside large organizations, and entrepreneurs either for themselves or in small teams, to ultimately influence the experience we’re all having on Planet Earth by creating better work experiences.” [Seth, 18:26]

“I think I’m personally attracted to people that I can really resonate with their journey.” [Kristen, 23:54]

“At our deepest levels, we just don’t want to be separated from the tribe.” [Seth, 29:56]

“When you start something, unless you’re lucky enough to get funding right out of the gate, you’re grinding from wherever you can grind from.” [Kristen, 32:20]

“I can totally resonate with anyone trying to build something by themselves and doing it from home. It’s really not easy.” [Kristen, 33:56]

“You’ve got to just be able to own what it is that you are great at, and ask for help in the places you’re not.” [35:55]


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Episode 25: Top Leadership Lessons From Omega Institute's Pioneering Programs, with Carla Goldstein

“I think in the middle of that storm, in the eye of that storm, is a new emerging consciousness of interconnection, and of a desire to bring hope and healing forward, and people are doing that in a lot of creative and different ways.” – Carla Goldstein

Even with all the polarizing points of view and differences of opinions in the world today, there is an inner connectedness between all of us. Today’s guest on Finding Brave, Carla Goldstein, has made it her mission to help people build a deeper understanding of this idea and experience of connectedness, and to leverage that understanding to lead, manage and communicate differently.

Carla Goldstein, JD, is a pioneer in women’s leadership with 25 years of public policy experience serving as Omega Institute’s chief external affairs officer to help Omega connect its work to change-making efforts around the world. She is also the cofounder of the Omega Women’s Leadership Center, a hub for convening, inspiring, and training women to # DoPowerDifferently. The Omega Institute for Holistic Studies receives more than 500 teachers and 23,000 people annually to attend its workshops, conferences, and retreats in Rhinebeck, New York.

How do we need to shift, and what must we need to address more effectively to connect with our universal humanity and support the deeper connection we need to thrive in today’s world? In this thought-provoking conversation, Carla shares helps us answer these questions and move towards healing, finding a different way to solve our conflicts with each other.

Highlights from this Episode:

  • What Omega has representing for the past 41 years, and what the organization is attempting to do in the world today [2:49]
  • What Carla feels is our deepest calling as a society [4:58]
  • How she is using her work as a healing tool to provide hope for others [8:54]
  • Why the “fundamental domination model” is keeping stuck – but there’s good news too [10:17]
  • The reason our natural instincts, such as “fight or flight”, are no longer serving us [18:51]
  • What changes and trends Carla is seeing in society over the past 5 years and a major lesson she’s learned about people in crisis [20:42]
  • Why there is so much heightened anxiety today and what we have to continue to remind ourselves [28:08]
  • One of the biggest challenges she sees facing leaders today [31:31]

For more information:




Resources Mentioned:

The Omega Women’s Leadership Intensive, October 2018

January 21, 2018: Sunday Sermon by Dr. Brené Brown at Washington National Cathedral

Also of interest:

Kathy’s Forbes Interview with Carla, How Women In Leadership Are Doing Power Differently, And Why They Must


“All living things are interconnected. You know, the knee bone is connected to the shin bone. I am connected to you; our hearts are connected (and) we’re connected to The Earth.” [4:11]

“We believe that so much of what plagues us is isolation, and isolation comes from disconnection.” [7:25]

“What makes a brave person, and what kinds of courage do we need to have in order to change the trajectory of the human story?” [16:28]

“The human experience is equalizing; it’s universal.” [22:00]

“We also see a deepening understanding that the problems we’re facing now are not just because of now, that they have a long tail and they have a long history.” [25:01]

“One of the things we are coming to understand about leadership is how contextual it is. Context is constantly changing.” [31:56]

“We need to encourage each other to be brave.” [35:56]


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Episode 24: 7 Damaging Ways Parents Keep Their Children From Growing Up

“Unless you have consciously addressed it, you’re probably reliving many patterns from childhood that you actually aren’t aware of and wouldn’t choose.”- Kathy Caprino

In January 2014,  I had the opportunity to talk with leadership expert Dr. Tim Elmore and learn more about how we as parents are failing our children today — coddling and crippling them — and keeping them from becoming leaders they are destined to be. The resulting Forbes article went viral, with 7.8 million views to date, and from this, it’s clear parenting today is an issue that warrants more discussion and more research-based guidance.

Today’s episode of Finding Brave offers my personal take on the question of how we parent our children so they grow up  healthy, self-confident and self-reliant, and very able to lead their life from their own values, ideas and beliefs. I share my own personal experiences as a parent, marriage and family therapist and someone who coaches thousands of mid-life professionals through limiting and negative beliefs, mindsets and behaviors that, sadly, they acquired through their childhoods that have damaged them.

You’ll hear how when it comes to parenting, everything we do for our children starts with us. I’m not judging here, as I’ve made every single one of these mistakes I’m talking about here, but the key is becoming more aware of the ways we are tripping up our children and getting in the way of their growing up successfully.

If what I talk about today resonates with you, please comment below and feel free to connect with me on Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn or Facebook. I’d love to hear about the topics that you’re struggling with, whether it be personally or professionally, so that I can discuss them on a future episode of the podcast.

Highlights from this Episode:

  • What I feel is an unequivocally bad way to approach parenting [9:01]
  • The unintended consequences of not allowing our children to risk, and how I addressed risk with my own children as they were growing up [10:15]
  • Why doing everything for our children is not effectively assisting them [13:57]
  • An experience that I had that taught me the importance of being realistic regarding the abilities of my children [15:41]
  • What happens when we let guilt get into the way of leading and parenting well [18:39]
  • How I’ve worked on my own insufficient boundaries and why this was necessary for a happy, successful life [19:35]
  • What we shouldn’t do when rewarding our kids [21:07]
  • How open we should be when sharing about our own experiences growing up [22:03]
  • Why intelligence isn’t a true measurement of maturity [24:56]
  • The reasons I recommend people talk to a marriage and family therapist [30:31]
  • My specific recommended strategies for moving forward to healthier parenting [31:16]

Resources Mentioned:

Episode 23: How To Take The High Road And Not Feed Hate

Arianna Huffington’s Thrive movement

Kathy’s blog on Thrive Global

American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy & Marriage and Family Therapist Locator

Finding Brave episode with Tim Elmore – How To Support Our Children To Navigate a Brand New World

Why Not Sharing Details of Parents’ Past Drug Use to Their Children is recommended


For hands-on help from Kathy:

Parenting for Success 4-session coaching program

Amazing Career Project 16-week online course

Amazing Career Certification Training For Coaches

Kathy’s Finding Brave monthly Group Coaching program

Private Career, Leadership and Personal Growth Coaching Services from Kathy

Kathy’s speaking services

Also of interest:

Kathy’s Forbes Article with Dr. Tim Elmore, 7 Crippling Parenting Behaviors That Keep Children From Growing Into Leaders


“If we’re going to talk about parenting, everything we do for our children starts with us.” [3:18]

“How many of us are doing the things that we read about, that we know are wrong?” [2:47]

“Everything we’re doing to our children, and everything that has been done to adults as children, is absolutely self-evident in their work, in their life and in their relationships.” [9:44]

“It’s a tough world right now, much more so than 20, 30 or 50 years ago in terms of our access to the negativity.” [10:48]

“The reality is your kid doesn’t have to love and be thrilled with you every minute. In fact, if that’s what you’re going for, you’re damaging them.” [19:05]

“It’s our responsibility as parents to model the life that we hope our children want to live, or model the life we want them to live.” [26:36]


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Episode 23: How To Take the High Road and Not Feed Hate

“How am I going to do to deal with these hard challenges in a way that will add positivity? We don’t need any more negativity,, hate, blame and vitriolic tearing down of human beings. What we need is positive, effective, balanced, reasoned ways of dealing with the challenges.” – Kathy Caprino

What’s happening in our world today that’s unleashed so much vitriol, rage and hatred? Everywhere we turn, whether it’s from public figures in the spotlight or people on social media, we’re seeing millions of people tearing others down mercilessly. It doesn’t have to be this way, and on today’s Finding Brave I share my thoughts on how we can all do our part to start taking the high road, and demonstrate values that support humanity, connectedness and compassion, not rip it apart. We each can use our voices powerfully and stand up for what we believe, but also do it in a respectful, caring way at the same time.

If you want to be known as someone who elevates, enlightens and educates, I hope you find this show helpful on your path.

I’d love to hear from you about how you take the high road or why you choose not to. Please comment below or connect with me on Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn or Facebook. Whether you agree or disagree with what I share here, please respond respectfully so we can build helpful bridges and support each other on this journey through life.

Highlights from this Episode:

  • What taking the high road in a situation can sometimes be mistaken for [3:19]
  • Changes that have happened in this world over the past number of years and how they’ve impacted us [4:46]
  • A fascinating experiment from 1963 that sheds light on human behavior and what is happening today [6:20]
  • The role that leadership in the United States has played in the current environment [11:06]
  • What to do to help you take the high road [13:11]
  • Why the Roseanne Barr situation has actually been a positive [20:31]
  • The two questions to ask yourself before posting a reply to someone on social media [23:09]
  • What things we really need in society today to support it [27:21]

Resources Mentioned:

The Milgram Experiment

January 21, 2018: Sunday Sermon by Dr. Brené Brown at Washington National Cathedral

Episode 19: How To Speak Up Effectively When You Feel You Can’t, with Kathy Caprino

Also of interest:

Kathy’s Forbes Post, What Is Feminism, And Why Do So Many Women And Men Hate It?


“I believe that people with a platform have a responsibility to make a positive difference.” [3:19]

“When you can’t see the person you’re hurting, you’re freer to commit an atrocity.” [9:45]

“We seem to have totally lost the ability to calmly and rationally discuss politics or other emotional issues.” [10:30]

“When someone comes at you with that much hate, sadly, what they don’t realize is what that shows about them.” [15:03]

“We’ve got to find brave in ourselves and breathe, regulate, and manage our emotions and our words, so that every world that you say, you’ve thought about and chosen carefully.” [27:49]


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Episode 22: How To Teach What You Know, With Confidence and Success, with David Siteman Garland

“Basically a lot of people…end up teaching the course they wish they had taken.” – David Siteman Garland

With the huge popularity of online courses today, you may be wondering if it’s time that you offered a course to your core audience or community, to help them in some meaningful way. If so, what would you choose to teach, who would you desire to help most, and how would you get started developing in?

Today’s expert guest on Finding Brave shares insider tips and strategies to help you answer those questions.

The creator of The Rise To The Top & Create Awesome Online Courses, David Siteman Garland is a top expert in guiding people through the process of creating and selling their own online courses. He’s taught thousands of students in over 100 countries who have launched successful courses on everything from teaching kindergarten to snowboarding.

Not only does David share why online courses are such a great way to  scale your business, but you’ll also hear the biggest mistakes people make when when they start out creating an online course. He reveals what you should expect to spend in terms of budget, as well as other powerful suggestions and advice to get you moving in developing and launching your own course that will make a difference to the people you’re passionate about supporting.   

Highlights from this Episode:

  • How someone can tell when they truly have something to teach – and monetize [4:34]
  • Why you shouldn’t discount the power of your own story and use it to sell a course [6:39]
  • What makes a successful online course [8:24]
  • How David helps his students break things down in order to teach others what they know [11:43]
  • The way that someone can identify the perfect niche for what they wish to teach [17:04]
  • Why David says that a course for everyone is really a course for nobody [22:41]
  • What David recommends in terms of use of video and how he creates courses for his own business [24:49]
  • Why you always need to be thinking long-term with courses, and starting small is perfectly fine to do [31:49]

For more information:




Twitter: @TheRiseToTheTop

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidsitemangarland/

Instagram: @davidsitemandgarland

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/risetothetop

Resources Mentioned:

David’s Free Training, 7 Steps to Creating, Promoting & Profiting from Online Courses

His E-Book, 7 Steps to Creating, Promoting & Profiting from Online Courses

David’s Podcast & Blog

Shane Olson’s 3D Character Workshop

Renae Christine Way’s Cupcake Trainings

Also of interest:

Kathy’s Forbes Interview with David, Launching A Successful Online Course Can Change The Course Of Your Business


“It’s all about the result. If you’ve gotten the result, there you go.” [6:53]

“When people are starting out, they’re teaching people who were like them at one time.” [10:04]

“If you can’t break it down, the way that I’m going to explain it right now, it’s not a good course topic.” [11:58]

“A lot of times it’s going to take trial and error to find that perfect niche.” [17:12]

“The coolest thing about having an online brand or personality-based business, is that you get to choose who you want to hang out with.” [21:21]

“To know that what you’re doing is helping people in some small, or huge way, is pretty exciting.” [36:11]


Download a Transcript                Download on iTunes

Episode 21: How To Deal With Sexual Harassment At Work, and Protect Yourself, with Tom Spiggle

“If you are facing retaliation at work, report it. Report it, report it, report it. By reporting it, not only do you potential have a claim for sexual harassment, you also have a claim for retaliation if they fire you afterwards.” – Tom Spiggle

Sexual harassment is something we all need to have greater awareness of around us, but what should we do it’s happened to us? How has the #MeToo movement changed how we’re experiencing this issue, particularly in today’s corporate world?

Your career is an asset and you should use the law to protect it, just as you would use a will to protect your physical estate. Our guest expert today shares exactly how to approach protecting yourself against mistreatment and harassment in the workplace.  

Tom Spiggle is a former federal prosecutor and founder of The Spiggle Law Firm, a firm that empowers women who have been fired or are afraid that they might be.

Tom shares powerful resources that help us navigate the complex issues around sexual harassment, and as you’ll hear, even a little bit of knowledge can go a long way when it comes to employment law. Getting the legal help you need usually does not involve a lengthy, and public, legal battle. Applying just a few basic legal principles discussed here today can help you come out on top, without going to court.

Highlights from this Episode:

  • The very personal reason that Tom does the work that he does in supporting women [2:13]
  • How we can use the law to protect our career, much like a will protects an estate [5:03]
  • The ways that the #MeToo movement has changed both the corporate world and the legal system [14:13]
  • What first steps you should take if you’ve been harassed [17:23]
  • Common misconceptions about lawyers and the legal system, and why even just a consultation is such a smart idea [19:08]
  • What potential consequences to your career to consider, both good and bad, when seeking legal recourse and why this should be about more than just a settlement [24:02]
  • What non-disclosure agreements are all about and whether or not we should sign one [29:33]
  • How everything that is happening in the world today in relation to sexual harassment is affecting men as well as women [30:28]

For more information:


Twitter: @tspiggle

FB: https://www.facebook.com/spigglelaw/?ref=bookmarks

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tom-spiggle-6870775/

Phone: (202) 449-8527

Resources Mentioned:

Tom’s Book, You’re Pregnant? You’re Fired!

DIY Legal Self-Help Legal Leverage Program and Blog Post about the Program

Episode 4: Gender, Power and Relationships: The Crushing Effects of Patriarchy, with Terry Real

Equal Employment Opportunity Commission

Avvo Lawyer Locator Site

National Employment Lawyers Association

Also of interest:

Kathy’s Forbes Interview with Tom, What To Do If You’ve Been Sexually Harassed In The Workplace


“There just seemed to be such a need, that that’s why I decided to focus on (in my career).” [4:33]

“A non-compete (clause) is only as powerful as the company’s willingness to enforce it.” [6:30]

“(#MeToo) is giving people a voice and helping people to realize that this happens.” [16:19]

“Not all lawyers have sharpened fangs and the first thing we’re going to do is drag you off to the courthouse steps; a lawyer who works a lot in this field is going to be sensitive to the realities of what you’re facing and will give you good advice.” [19:01]

“Your testimony, your story, is all you need to move forward in these kinds of cases. It’s evidence, and I don’t think a lot of people realize that.” [22:05]


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Episode 20: How To Achieve Your Potential By Embracing Your Passion and Purpose, with Lilian Ajayi-Ore

“I force my students to really challenge their minds to ignite both the right side of their brain and the left side of their brain. So they bring in critical and creativeness, and when those two things mix together, it’s just beautiful.” – Lilian Ajayi-Ore

Today’s Finding Brave features not only a disruptive leader who is realizing her own tremendous potential, but someone who has created a global movement showing others how to do the same in their own lives.

Lilian Ajayi-Ore is the Founder and Executive Director of the Global Connections for Women Foundation (GC4W), an award-winning not-for-profit organization headquartered in New York City, with a reach of 3.5 million people worldwide. GC4W is one of the leading international non-profits of the millennium in the areas of gender equality, women’s  empowerment, and youth empowerment. Lilian was invited to create the first Teach Gender Equality certificate course for Microsoft Education, and the certificate course is being offered to 2 million teachers worldwide. She is a current doctorate student at the University of Pennsylvania and holds a degree in International Relations from Harvard, and has served on the Permanent Mission of Nigeria to the United Nations, working as policy negotiator in the second committee. Lilian is an award-winning humanitarian and leadership ambassador, who has been invited to speak at the United Nations (in New York), The World Bank, United Nations Development Program, Toronto World Leadership Forum, to name a few.

Lilian is currently a university faculty member at the School of Professional Studies at the New York University, and others. Her professional experience also includes working as the Head of Digital Strategy and Big Data Analytics for several Fortune 500 and Fortune 100 companies including Saks Fifth Ave, Comcast NBC Universal, Panasonic, IBM, Macy’s and Citibank.

Lilian’s insights will help you stand up for what you believe and truly embrace your potential. You’ll hear how you can pursue your passion and purpose, and why fear doesn’t have to stand in your way if you learn how to reframe and even embrace it.

Highlights from this Episode:

  • Why Lilian started GC4W and how she had to “step up” to create it [5:23]
  • The reason she didn’t walk away from something bigger than her, even though others told her to [12:13]
  • What Lilian did in those critical first few years to make GC4W stand out [14:23]
  • How she developed her specific teaching philosophy and the three components of her method that she uses to connect her students with the subject matter [15:58]
  • Where she has received pushback for her educational style [19:23]
  • Her practical advice for young people struggling to find their purpose and the very first step she recommends they take [23:23]
  • What can happen when you decide to turn fear into a positive emotion [29:58]
  • The female role models that have influenced Lilian on her journey and why she feels everyone needs people to emulate [33:23]

For more information:




Resources Mentioned:

17: Expanding Your Introvert Power and Leadership, with Jennifer Kahnweiler

Kathy’s TEDx talk “Time to Brave Up

Helping People Win at Work: A Business Philosophy Called Don’t Mark My Paper, Help Me Get an A by Ken Blanchard and Garry Ridge

The Energy of Money: A Spiritual Guide to Financial and Personal Fulfillment by Maria Nemeth, Ph.D.


“With any idea that you have, you’ve got to start with the research. How are you creating value for the space, and where are you going to fall into it? What’s going to differentiate you from everyone else?” [8:19]

“Obviously we were evolving from all the things we were doing from the beginning. Finding your purpose, or finding a value proposition with what you do has to change. You have to allow the iterative process to take place.” [15:24]

“If you enable students and give them all the tools that they need, do different exercises to really get them out of their comfort zone and challenge them mentally, they will produce their best work.” [20:46]

“Set your mind on finding a way to uncover what your talents are using other people as an example.” [25:25]

“It’s about making value, or creating value for the space you’re in and really committing to it.” [27:02]

“When I feel afraid, I tell myself I’m on to a great thing.” [30:01]

“Find bravery moments. Not every moment is going to be a victorious one, but at least you were brave enough to do it.” [34:41]


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