“What we’re calling narcissistic behavior is actually the behavior that comes out of massive insecurity, and guess what? If you have skin and you’re a human, you have felt insecure at some point in time and then you’ve probably behaved in a way that was narcissistic, as a result of that insecurity.” – Dov Baron
Narcissism is damaging, and a topic that I talk and teach about often, but what exactly is it and how can we recognize its traits in ourselves, and in others? Today’s Finding Brave guest gives his take on these questions and also shares his deep expertise and insightful strategies aimed at helping each of us develop our own authentic, empowered leadership.
Twice cited as one of Inc. Magazine’s Top 100 Leadership Speakers to hire, Dov Baron was also cited in the Meeting and Event Professionals Guide to The Top 100 Motivational Speakers and Named as one of the Top 30 Global Leadership Guru’s.
A bestselling author of several books, including his latest — Fiercely Loyal; How High Performing Companies Develop and Retain Top Talent — Dov has his finger on the pulse of the evolving world of NextGen leadership. He is the host of the national (US) TV show Pursuing Deep Greatness with Dov Baron on ROKU TV, and the host of the Number One Podcast for Fortune 500 Listeners (globally) Dov Baron’s Leadership and Loyalty Show on iTunes and FM & AM Radio Stations across the US.
Today’s conversation is an eye-opener, exposing negative behaviors in ourselves and others, but it isn’t about blaming or attacking. It’s focused on looking as compassionately as possible at what we’re all experiencing as individuals, and then using effective strategies to become better versions of ourselves.
Highlights from this Episode:
- What we need to know about narcissistic behaviors and how they differ from narcissistic personality disorder [4:05]
- The hallmark traits of narcissistic personality disorder [5:58]
- Why it isn’t your job to fix or tolerate someone displaying these traits [9:41]
- What Dov says his job is, who he works with and how he helps them [12:05]
- The importance of setting boundaries, even with your closest of family members [12:56]
- The role that gender plays in identifying these behaviors, and what to consider in the #MeToo era [15:56]
- How the audiences Dov speaks too usually receive his message [19:51]
- An exercise that will move you forward with just a few questions [25:25]
- The ways you can recognize what has to be healed in yourself [35:44]
- A powerful request that Dov has for you which requires action today [47:14]
For More Information:
http://fullmontyleadership.com/
https://twitter.com/TheDovBaron
https://www.linkedin.com/in/dovbaron/
https://www.instagram.com/dovbaronleadership/
https://www.facebook.com/DovBaronLeadership/
Resources Mentioned:
Dov’s Podcast & YouTube Channel
His Latest Book, Fiercely Loyal; How High Performing Companies Develop and Retain Top Talent & Other Works
Dov’s Authentic Leadership Matrix
His Video, The cost of trying to be “Normal”
Kathy’s Forbes Blog with Dov, Narcissistic Leaders—The Destructive Lies They Tell Themselves And Others
Kathy’s Post, 6 Toxic Behaviors That Push People Away: How To Recognize Them In Yourself and Change Them
4: Gender, Power and Relationships: The Crushing Effects of Patriarchy, with Terry Real
37: What Is Heaven On Earth To You and Can You Have It?, with Martin Rutte
74: Lean Out: The Real Truth About Women, Power and the Workplace, with Marissa Orr
QUOTES:
“I’m always nervous about labelling somebody as a narcissist. I’d much rather say these are narcissistic behaviors on the spectrum.” [8:57]
“What I do in my private work is I’m looking to bring home the disenfranchised parts of your soul.” [12:05]
“Rules are the black holes of joy, and boundaries manifest joy.” [13:22]
“My job is this. It’s either to wake you up, or to plant a seed.” [23:10]
“That purpose has never gone away. My purpose was there right at the beginning, but it’s evolved and it’s deepened.” [29:33]
“Action is the currency of the brave.” [46:43]
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