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“Self-pity is when you exaggerate how bad your life is. When you start to get helpless, hopeless and you think there’s no hope and life can never get better, you dig in your heels and stay stuck. So if you say you are going to work on not feeling sorry for yourself, instead say that you’re going to work on gratitude. That’s one really simple way to start changing your life and building mental muscle.” – Amy Morin

What if I told you that you can learn to change the way you think, and you can train your brain to work for you, not against you? My guest today initially wrote a blog post to improve her own mental strength, and that led to a career helping millions of people around the globe build their mental muscles, and as a result, live much more fulfilled lives.

Amy Morin is a licensed clinical social worker, psychotherapist, and psychology lecturer at Northeastern University. She’s also an international bestselling author. Her books, 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do, and 13 Things Mentally Strong Women Don’t Do have been translated into 33 languages.

The Guardian dubbed her “the self-help guru of the moment” and Forbes calls her a “thought leadership star.”

Her TEDx talk, The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong, is one of the most popular talks of all time with more than 10 million views. She’s a regular contributor to Forbes, Inc., and Psychology Today where her articles on mental strength reach more than 2 million readers each month.

Her advice for building mental strength has been featured by major media outlets, including Fox News, CNN,, Today, Good Morning America, Success, Business Insider, Time, and the Hallmark Channel.

In this episode Amy shares her framework for learning to control your emotions and take positive actions, which will result in you taking back your power. Amy is someone who is not only inspirational as a wonderful therapist, but as a writer and influencer in the way that she crafts her messages, which is why I’m so excited to be bringing you this conversation with her today. 

Interestingly, we recorded this well before the global health crisis hit, but each insight that Amy shares can be used today, to help us cope and even thrive through these very trying times.

Highlights from this Episode:

  • What led Amy to the work she does, and why she chooses to focus on what not to do in order to build mental strength [4:49]

  • How to know what mental strength looks like, plus the ways that it differs from mental health [10:36]

  • The real reason a lot of people stay in “victim mode” [14:01]

  • Amy’s simple steps for building your mental muscles that anyone can do right now [17:06]

  • How to consciously stop feeling pity for yourself, and why asking for help is absolutely essential in the journey to build mental strength [19:22]

  • Why Amy feels that her message has resonated with so many people [26:40]

  • One particularly unhealthy habit to start watching for [28:21]

  • The ways that Amy’s life has changed since originally writing her blog post and books, and how she is now helping so many people by sharing her knowledge [30:18]

For More Information:

Resources Mentioned: 

All of Amy’s Books 

Her Viral Blog Post, 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do & TEDx Talk, The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong 

For more about Kathy’s upcoming book The Most Powerful You: 7 Bravery-Boosting Paths To Career Bliss, sign up for her weekly newsletter at for updates, free giveaways, contests, and more, coming in Spring 2020. And to discover if you are experiencing any of the 7 damaging power gaps today, take Kathy’s Power Gap Survey and find out!                                                                                                                                                                                         

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“When we talk about mentally strong people, we often look at Navy Seals or elite athletes, but what does it look like to be a strong woman? [3:53]

“What’s the worst habit you have? What counter-productive thing are you doing? When we get rid of that, all of your hard work becomes much more effective. I saw it work, so then I applied it to my own life.” [7:40]

“It’s much easier to think you’re a victim of a cruel world and the cruel people in it rather than you have the power to change your life.” [15:18]

“I’m a huge fan of finding a community. If you want to be strong, you have to surround yourself with strong people.” [23:07]

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I’m thrilled to share that is a sponsor of Finding Brave! Take advantage of their great special offer of one FREE book of your choice with a 30-day FREE membership trial! And feel free to keep the book even if you cancel the membership. Click here to sign up for your free book!

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Kathy’s new book The Most Powerful You: 7 Bravery-Boosting Paths to Career Bliss shares vital information on the 7 most damaging power gaps that 98% of professional women face and how to overcome them. Boost your power and confidence today!


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